flirting FAIL

I'm no good at flirting because I am far too sarcastic and vague and my first impression is pretty distant from the way I actually am . It's not that I am bad at meeting people, I am actually quite good at coming off as professional in business activities, but in a friendship/dating environment, even though I am an ocean of randomness, interesting facts, and creativity; you would probably find me very pod-like and bland during the first 5-8 times you talk to me.

Why? Because I know that my personality is one that takes a little getting used to, at least that's how I see it. You see, I am most comfortable and truest when I feel like me making a joke at your expense such as, "hey nice shirt, where'd you get it, lost and found at the Laundromat?" or saying something disturbing such as "I bet if I ran your dog over with my car you'd take me seriously" won't cause you to punch me or call the cops. These are things you can't say to just anyone, I know this, and I am actually pretty good at figuring out who can take what type of sarcastic comments and who needs a custom set of "S.Vincent".

The problem with my system is that until I figure your personality out, you get a blank "S.Vincent" disk, filled with a bunch of shitty software that comes for free with most male computer systems. This obviously does not work in the post-college world of see you maybe once and twice and game over. S.Vincent is most certainly a PC in a Mac world. There I am on the shelf at Best Buy with my clunky grey body and Windows 2000 demo software with the stupid paper clip man while right next to me is a shiny Macbook with a crystal clear animation of Wall-E playing on the 20 inch screen. S.Vincent = Suitable Partner FAIL.

Not too many people are willing to deeply investigate anymore and that's cool, I get it. I get it a little too well and don't even try to adapt because I don't have the memory space to run the new programs. But right now, I may have a potential buyer, and this clunky little laptop with his outdated software and poor graphics is trying hard to impress. Hopefully my hard-drive doesn't overheat and burn her lap.

I know I said 7 albums for today, but since we are inside the respectable top 20 and I started this too late in the day, we will see how far we go while still keeping quality at a premium. Probably not enough time for 7 though.

17-Air France "No Way Down": I don't know how to classify this music. It's kind of instrumental, kind of electronic, kind of ambient, and kind of dream-pop. But this was no mistake in keeping this album on the top half of the list like I did with Quiet Village. It is more of a music enthusiasts type album, but I really think there is something for everyone here. The music is really textured and lush and it reminds me a lot of a simpler sounding and sunnier M83 also in that it excels as a headphones album, but isn't %100 necessary.
(**brief pause here for explanation. Obviously a headphones album means you should listen to it on headphones, but the reason WHY you listen to it on headphones is because there are a lot of faintly audible details to the songs that get easily missed if you are distracted by outside noise. These faint sounds can make or break the album, so it is crucial that if you are listening you use headphones, preferably ones that do a real good job of cancelling noise or in a quiet room.**)
This album is a well crafted and planned in that each song has a good sense of identity. The album is short, only 10 tracks, each with a different direction and intent in crafting a story. The artists create a sense of a journey or what I think of is a 3 minute montage, as corny as that sounds. I imagine well dressed fashion models doing lots of smiling or 1000 yard staring with the camera man using all sorts of European country side backgrounds but no talking and letting the music lead the emotion. Abercrombie is a little too loud stylistically for this, but BR should be playing this in their stores. Pay me money BR!

16-Ryan Adams and the Cardinals "Cardinology": I'm not sure how well this album is going to fare. Most music critics don't especially like Ryan Adams. There must be a reason, and I think he's got a little Chris Martin in him. I also like to think of Ryan Adams as Diet John Mayer. Very Talented (better singer than John, not even close on guitar) Dates a B-list celebrity (mandy moore) to John's A-List (Jennifer Anniston). Wears weird dirty art clothes compared to Johns designer dirty art clothes. Both preens for the ladies, but John gets the cream of the crop state university girls while Ryan gets the private college moody emo girls. Here's how I see it taking place in Beverly Hills. John is coming out of a Georgio Armani store while Ryan is exiting a Salvation Army (only in BH would they be across the street from each other). They make eye contact, then John looks away in a VERY obvious entitled and dismissive fashion and then Ryan gives him the finger. That sets John off and they dance fight in the street and never a bed-headed hair is displaced.

Oh, you wanna know about the Album? Fiiiiiiineeeee......its actually Ryans best work in a while and I think it has to do with the structure of The Cardinals blue-grassy country that really highlights his over-dramatic voice. It's old world simplicity meets young chaotic talent and its a sure fire thing for Ryan. He went on his own for a while and some of that was really really good and some of it was dud. With the Cardinals, it is consistently good the whole way through like his work in his first band "Whiskytown". Love the tracks "Fix It" "Cobwebs" "Crossed out Name" and "Sink Ships" but the whole album is solid.

15-Beach House "Devotion": This album came a long at a bad time in 2008. The month of March (I think) when I was far too busy with rowing to really absorb it. Sometimes I devalue albums based on their immediate impact, but I think we all know that this is a bad idea. I go back and forth on every album. Even last years list doesn't hold the same water as it does now. The largest turn around in the history of S.Vincent goes back to 2003 with Dashboard Confessional. I used to yell at Grzy for listening to it, I hated it, but he persisted cause hes a piece of shit who abuses small animals and children, but he loves me. Somewhere around the summer time, I got locked in. I couldn't stop listening. I was going through a rough patch that probably catapulted the album, but still from hate to love in 4 months is pretty big.

Anyway, this album has a real soft feel. So you can't listen to it expecting huge ups and down. I like to call albums like this creepers, cause they creep into the forefront when you least expect it. (Yes, its different than a "grower") This and the Deerhunter album went from being off the list at the end of summer to smack dab in the middle. Lots of elegant moans, sighs, and other vocal noises that don't involve words are a major part of the music in this album. Every word is drawn out into a echoey effect. Every song is a male/female duet with great harmony. Most of the time they sing right on top of each other creating an eery howl. If you like bands such as Belle and Sebastian, you will like this album a lot.

And that's our time for today. Sorry gang, but I ran out of working hours. Will return with more tomorrow!