File me under B, for Bad-Ass Blogger

The problem with taking all these little notes is that I often forget what they mean, or some of the background behind them. But I have lots of little tidbits here and I thought the more the better so todays blog will be a bunch of little snipets. Short and Sweet blog, like Maria Zandri, but not like LG who is tall and sour, because she complains all day about everything.

I have a problem with saying "no problem". Unfourtunatly I can't say that phrase without sounding like a sarcastic ass and I can't stop saying it as my auto response when someone says "excuse me" or "sorry". I don't knwo why I noticed it just now, but if I offend you by the way I say "no problem" be aware that I am aware of it.

I had a particularly harrowing trip to the grocery store the other day. I think I was walking around cursed and didn't know it. Let me break down the sequence of events: First I drop-kicked my gum when I got out of my car. It went so far that I lost track of it, and then stepped on it just before I got in the store. WTF are the chances of that?!?! Then I got a cart with a bad wheel that decided to kick in halfway through the trip. (not exactly earth shattering) Then to my shock and dismay, I found out that they discontinued Kraft Carb-Free BBQ sauce at stop and shop. Don't they realize that I'll die with out my BBQ? how is it possible to do such a thing? I was very upset. Have no fear! I found a worthy replacement. Mix Carb-Free ketchup with BBQ Seasoning and viola! a sauce that kinda tastes like BBQ with no sugar. Brilliant! However, this momentary triumph was spoiled when I got home and in the impossible task of holding all of my 10 grocery bags, reaching into my pocket, pulling out my 5000 keys, selecting the house key, and getting it into keyhole all at the same time, a jar of garlic fell out and smashed all over the door way. Little minced garlic peices everywhere....I think my heart smashed into little minced peices too. I was done for the day, I needed a double wings on the rocks and a nap.

I realized that a Taquito is a mix of the words Taco and Burrito. However, I think that it is more of a mix between a Taco and a Dorito; which would explain why I would need to call in sick if I ever ate one.

I would be interested in how many times I fake laugh or fake smile in a day to my co-workers. I find myself doing this a lot! Just to get through a stupid conversation ASAP. People, the fake laugh means SHUT UP and GO AWAY! I would say its around 35 times a day I am faking an expression. I think everyone does it, but those of us in customer service are pros at it.

They changed the phone number for 1-800-Mattress. I'm serious, watch the commercial next time. I am very confused now.

On CSI: Since I am a late bloomer to the show and catch re-runs and currents, I could be confused about this for no reason. Is Sarah Sidal in love with Grissom? What is their relationship exactly? What is Grissoms deal anyway? Why doesn't he bring a gun anywhere? Why is he so foolish when it comes to things like that, but so smart in things like motives? Why is he so surprised when people want to hurt him?

Seans Rotten Tomato: I hate when people pronounce the names of countries with the accent from that country. i.e. "mayheeco" "Fraaaancee" "eetalia" when they or their parents are not from that country. You sound like a pompus loser. Stop.

Now, as many of you know; Alex Bea was the inspiration for me to start blogging, and to start legislature to A-bomb everything south of the Mason Dixon. However, another influence who laid some foundation for this desire is The Sports Guy on ESPN.com. If you are a sports and pop-culture nut like me, I think you will enjoy checking in on The Sports Guy. He's awesome as a time killer and writes great stuff.

This post written while listening to: The Beastie Boys "To the 5 Boroughs"