it is a bitch

Karma and Revenge, that is. (PS, I made that LOL Cats superbowl edition myself, pretty funny no?) It always seems to give you a few hints before it smacks your emotional teeth out. Like a rotten smell coming from the drain on your sink before it back-flows all over your house. You would think that the citizens of that crap-hole of a city would be experts in the field of "hometown sports jinxes and how to avoid them", but no, they are painfully un-aware of it. Putting out 19-0 books, scheduling the parade, downtalking spygate. Even someone who is as stupid as me avoided it by gracefully hoping the Giants would win and refusing to over hype them or under talk the Pats. Those are the sports fans rules to keep positive karma. I don't know why Boston can't get it, probably cause they don't know how to keep their mouth shut, and they don't have anything else to talk about besides seafood.

This feels so good to those in the Empire state. I don't know how to express in words how good it feels to have the burdon of most epic collapse off of our shoulders. Of course we are talking about the epic collapse by the Yankees in 2004. The knock down drag out affair that took an entire week to kill me a little every day. By game 5, I knew it was over for the Yankees. That they could not win despite 2 more games to play. Easily one of the most painful memories I will ever have. But now, a team from this area was the one to hand it back to Boston; where it belongs. That can NOT be underestimated. A team that used to play in Yankee stadium as a matter of fact.

I argue that the Patriots loss was much MUCH worse than that of the 2004 Yankees. Yes, the Giants were underestimated by everyone, but I don't think that anyone was over-estimating the Patriots by calling them the greatest team in history considering they went 18-0. The 2004 yankees didn't have anyone calling them "the greatest team of all time" and the 2004 redsox were actually considered by many to be the stronger team going in and easily got the wild card berth, with only their choking history holding them as underdogs in the series. So for the Red Sox to win was truly shocking at the time, but that was no David vs Goliath story. The 2004 ALCS was more like Blue Goliath vs Red Goliath when Blue Goliath got a head start and then tragically stumbled and fell.

I feel bad for Tom Brady and Junior Seau, and thats about it. They are good people. I almost feel bad for the Patriots team, their fans and the media screwed them, but with all their past success, not really all that bad. Mostly, I am so so happy that Boston fans and Belicheat got knocked down and not only knocked down, but branded with the #1 symbol of sports failure for a long lonnnnngggg time. I feel another one in their midst coming soon, but we will disclose that after it happens. I am sure they will still harp on their past super bowl victories and the 04 and 07 world series wins, and they have earned that right, just as the Yankees get to bring up the 26 world championships from time to time.

Yes Boston, you got a 4 year break from holding the most epic collapse in professional sports history, but now it is back in your hands. Seems fitting in an area with awful people, road systems, food, and weather. I am going to shut my mouth about it from now on because I don't want to come down on that area forever, otherwise I might be leaving myself open to karma coming back to get me. Next year is a new year, and I learned my lesson back in the day. That was enough for this NY'er.

clear eyes, full hearts, CAN'T LOSE!

I have been storing up all kinds of good blog ideas for you guys, but since my brain has less substance than half a packet of instant oatmeal, I think this will be an underwhelming experience for you.

.

I will admit to being distracted from blogging regularly by NBC.com. They have sucked me into watching full episodes of the office and friday night lights while I work, instead of filling the internet with my stories of poop, homeless people, and personal despair. To that effect, I have been entranced by the free episode offerings and could not resist watching them while at work. I wonder how many jobs NBC will have terminated thanks to their gratuity?

.

It's officially Autumn as of yesterday, the temprature stayed under 60 degrees here for the whole day, and S.Vincent officially turned on his heat for the first time. Therefore, please break out your jackets, candy corn, and leaf rakes. Also, be advised that the leaf peepers will soon be all over the Hudson Valley, spending money on useless tours, and gushing over "the colors". They will also drive 10mph under the speed limit and be oblivious to any sort of real society, besides the society of douchebags. Congratulations leaf peepers, you're still not colorblind, now go back to your leaf-less towns before I turn you upside down in my garbage can.

.

Why does breast cancer get so much attention over the other cancers? Why do they get an official color and month? It's sexist! Whats the color for colon cancer and stomach cancer and testicle cancer and lung cancer? What month is leukemia month? Where can I donate to prostate cancer by buying yogurt? Just because they have a cute color and are sex symbols doesn't mean that they should get anymore attention then cancers common to men. Sure, maybe my colon isn't as attractive as your breasts, but having cancer in it will kill me just the same.

.

I tried to get into my house using the remote unlock for the car. I am not joking you. In fact, when it didn't work, I pushed it again. This is how tired I am.

.

I nearly killed myself and/or others 3 times in the past 3 days. Once in the car, once in my coaching launch, and then once in my single scull. I won't go into details cause they were scary, but stay away from me till I go a day without being 3 seconds away from death. I will let you know when the coast in clear.

.

The S.Vincent opinion on the Yankees in 45 seconds or less. 1) Alex Rodriguez is not necessary to keep. He may be an MVP, but he has proven unable to win championships by himself. Not surprisingly its still the best team wins the championship every year, not the best player. Evidenced by the past 100 world series winning teams. Therefore, although a fantastic player, he is worth only 1 million or 2 more than any other player in the league. If he is not available for that price, let him go where he chooses. Joe Torre can be let go, I don't think its a good idea to do so, but I also don't think its a bad idea to try out Joe Girardi, who is the best choice for the job by far. DUH, he was the manager of the year in 2006. Mattingly is not ready quite yet. Anyway, I go back and forth on Joe every 10 minutes, so don't ask me. There are 2 necessary people to bring back....Jorge and Mo. Jorge was the best catcher in the AL this season, and Mo has invaluable qualities to all the relievers in that bullpen as a coach and can still bring the heat as one of the few automatic closers in baseball.

Go Indians!

This post written while listening to: Smashing Pumpkins "That's the way (my love is)"

I pull up to the front of your driveway, with magic soakin my spine.....

Can you read my mind?

I thought of a really funny joke to play on the morning of the fourth of July. Here's the dilly: you set off a large firework (M-80, cherry bomb, general tso's chicken fart) INSIDE the house. Can you imagine the reaction? Think about a large explosion inside a house when everyone is alseep. It'd be off da hook, yo

Of course, you have to handle such immature genius professionally, or it's not that funny. You should pull the gag inside a house with more than 2-3 people since a group dynamic is necessary for such hijinx. I find that people are much more accepting of sillyness when there is lots of people than when it is just you and one person. They take it personally if its just the 2 of you. To start, you will need some sort of container to house the firework such as a old paint can, an old cooking pot, or a bucket. Next, it will have to be early, but not too early, sometime in the window of 7am-830am, so as not to make people too annoyed with a loss of sleep. Then you have to get your voice warmed up for the post explosion announcement: "HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY EVERYBODY!!!". I see people falling out of beds, people screaming in fear, and running around in silly sleep garments, utter chaos. I'm giddy at the thought of doing this in 2008 so you better try to remember not to invite me to your house.

There is this young fat kid named Batman who sent me this video a long time ago. He is a little messed up in the head, and I am a whole lot messed up in the head, so we enjoy cinema like this. It's a patriotic video, so I figured I'll leave it up for the whole week. If you don't like it, you don't like America, and I'll kill you cause it says I can in the constitution....Punk!

HBO (one of my 3 favorite channels) has a new show called Flight of the Conchords that is really funny. I know that they have been out as a comedy act for quite a while, so spare me the smug "I knew about them before you did" garbage. I am just saying that the show is good, so if you like Flight of the Conchords or don't know anything about them, watch the show. It's available on the orgasmic ON-DEMAND feature and plays new episodes on Sunday nights I think.

"so how about them yankees?" is an easy way to request a stabbing from S.Vincent.

I will be following up on the Mr. Quick story soon. I have been a little helter skelter this whole week with all the prank planning, hot dog contest eating, and fantasy baseball managing duties, so keep your peepers checking back regularly.

This post written while listening to: Collective Soul "7even year Itch"