Thank you DD

So I picked up my new (to me) car yesterday. Even by S.Vincent standards it was a quick sale. I am known far and wide as Mr. Impulsive Immediate Buyer, but usually you would take more than 20 minutes to purchase a new car, even if you were careless with such things. However, I threw caution, not just to the wind, but to a level 5 southern coast city hurricane. I picked it out in 10 minutes and had the 40 documents signed in 5. I walked outta the dealership with keys in my hand and a "this is my first time in prison and I weigh 140 lbs" face.

The car is more than fine. It's literally a steal by most standards of the word, I was really just amazed how quickly someone can dispatch 7 thousand dollars and walk out with a certified machine. I usually avoid such situations due to the length of time involved in such a decision and paperwork and so on and so forth. But that was so easy, I might just go trade it in next weekend for a different one cause I feel like driving red car.

It's a 2001 Nissan Altima and its the exact same color as the Grzylle's car. With tons of homosexual ambiguity already surrounding our relationship, this may not have been a smart move for me and my never ending quest for multiple ladies. However, I am going to propose that we start a interstate car gang and terrorize the eastern seaboard with our trifecta of male chauvenism, indie music knowledge, and disregard for social faupax's. We'll call ourselves the "Teal Tridents" and drag race down neighberhood streets with our 0-60 in 10 second, mid level, asain 4 door sedans. Watch out world! If you hear the ca-caw of a raven, a squeal of discount tires, and smell a delicious Old Spice underarm spray fragrance mixed with old unisuit funk. You know who it is. Move bitch, get out da way......or maybe get in the back cause I like the way your butt hangs out of the bottom of your airbrushed cotton shorts.

So I roll into Dunkin' Donuts today for a little hot beverage revival after practice and the nice lady at the counter asks me "would you like a free donut?" Now, we all know I am in a never ending quest for multiple ladies, as well as to maintain my girlish figure. Sadly, I am also weak against any fried pastry. So given that this particular donut was free, I had to say yes, Boston Creme PLEASE! Upon receiving, I took out half of that sucker with one ferrocious chomp. As I am happily paying for my coffee, I ask the nice lady "mo waf arf bees monufs wor?" which she in turn translated to be "So what are these donuts for?" and then replied with a ample amount of disgust "It's tax day"........shortly after her declaration, she was removing chewed dough, custard, and slobber from her hair sprayed directly from the mouth of a mr. S.Vincent.

Guess who forgot to do their taxes? No worries though, I banged it out in 30 mins online and had the paltry ~400 dollar return direct deposited into my account. Which explains why I am here online, blabbering on about myself.

YFYB is massive ass certified

Tuesday night is "Rob and Big" night in the S.Vincent Household and last tuesday's episode was especially fantastic. It really came out with a bang, so I will share the first 5 minutes with you, and hopefully you will want to spend many of your future minutes enjoying the antics of a one Mr. Rob and a one Mr. Big. There were hilarious hippopotamuses, absurdly sized donuts, a guide on pitfalls in designing a house for a 400lb man, and jabs made at Tyra Banks for being over-dramatic about life in general.
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Please enjoy this clip. It's going to send you to the episode on mtv.com then after you watch, you come back we will talk about what else I discovered.

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Of course, anyone who knows S.Vincent knows that he lusts after 2 things......oakley products and donuts. When I saw BB go to town on that peice of pastry, I knew that I had to have one for my very own self. I began scouring the internet for my one true love. This actually proved quite difficult because the search terms of "giant, big, huge, etc." and "donut" yeilded 2 types of results. Some were of donuts that were just slightly bigger than normal donuts, not the cartoonishly delicious one that BB had. Or, they yeilded places where there are big donuts structures to draw attraction to a donut shop. Famous in the California area I guess.

But, a small peice of success was found at the website http://voodoodoughnut.com/ . Unfourtunatly they do not airmail their donuts, which would have been my solution to getting one. But check out how awesome that donut shop is! They have donuts with bacon on them. Donuts with cap'n crunch on them.It's open 24 hours. You can get married there. I swear to god if it was in the tri-state area, I would move there. Damn you Oregon!!

I also prefer to spell them as donut rather than doughnut. I am quite sure that doughnut is the proper spelling and donut is a trademark way that Dunkin' Donuts spells it. I am not a huge fan of DD's donuts, but I am also very lazy, so donut is how I am going to spell it. Deal with it.

Anyway, the search continues. I think I should have some kind of luck in NYC, so I will keep you updated, hopefully accompanied by an awesome picture, if I am to succeed.

Oh, and Happy Valentines Day.........suckers.